Wednesday, June 6, 2012

E3: Electronic Excrement Expo

Hey guys...yeah, I'm sad right now. Sad because this year's E3 (so far) is a total bore.

What Happened?

The big three press conferences failed to impress in any way; Microsoft's conference showed Halo 4 (which I don't care about) and then they spent the entirety of their conference talking about tablet support for their console. I honestly zoned out and then fell asleep during that entire show. And if it wasn't the two things above, it was some other aim-down-sights game that had too many explosions and too little excitement. Oh yeah, and they also tried to make multi-platform games look better on their console by telling you that you can shell out money for DLC on their console first.

And then Sony's conference...ugh. They spent a huge chunk of their conference talking numbers and new partnerships. They did show Quantic Dream's next game which I'm...oddly not excited for considering how much I dig Heavy Rain (seriously, I love that game) and then they showed "Playstation Soulless Brawler" which looks like utter shit on its own merits, let alone when you compare it to its obvious source material (which I'm not going to do, because it goes against my policies). They also showed The last of Us which...I also can't bring myself to care about. Their biggest blunder, however, was failing to show really anything for that shiny new handheld that they recently released! They acknowledged the existence of a "Call of Doodie" game, but that's for the lowest common denominator of those who call themselves "gamers" to get some quick sales on the thing. I am actually interested in buying a Vita sometime in the future, but they aren't trying to give any reasons beyond Street Fighter X Tekken...but I already have that on PS3.

Instead of showing off a heafty amount of Vita games, they spent 10-15 minutes talking about some gimmicky piece of nonsense called "Wonderbook" for ten years olds who's parents/older siblings happen to have a PS3. There was nothing NEW at their show and if it was new, it was hardly worth noting. And then they also started on their own "DLC exclusivity" tangent.

And then Nintendo...siiiiiigh. I was completely ready to be super duper excited for their show...but they also failed to deliver. They started their show so strong with Pikmin 3 for Wii U, but the show went downhill very fast. The majority of my Big N's show was showing off games that are already out for other consoles and if they weren't that, then they were games that I had known about previously. They then decided it would be a great idea to show Wii Fit U and an even more wonderful idea to end the show with NintendoLand. Come on, guys! Where's Metroid? Where's Zelda? Where's a freakin' HD STARFOX?! What the HELL is going on?! Where are the awesome surprises?! I already knew about New Super Mario Bros. U and New Super Mario Bros. 2 was revealed already! Which reminds me: why were are talking about 3DS games in a Wii U presentation when the 3DS games were getting their own show anyway? I appreciate the fact that Nintendo is also trying to appeal to their new, quote, casual demographic...but they are not the ones who watch E3.

I don't understand. Maybe this is the result of longer development cycles taking up so much time that there's no time to devote to creating games that will surprise the crowds this year rather than showing the same stuff we showed last year. None of the big three had much of anything interesting to say and while I am most likely still going to buy a Wii U just because I know what's (hopefully) going to be on it in the future, Nintendo didn't do a good job of securing that future by showing stuff that would be available in 2013. Ubisoft seemed to be the only presser that had new stuff to show, but my interest in the stuff only goes so far, save for Rayman: Legends. EA's conference was dominated by sports BS and rumors of Dead Space 3 were floating around for so long that the game may as well have been confirmed before they showed it.

I dunno...maybe I was expecting too much? Or has the usual "WOW" factor of E3 died in the wake of the recent decline of the Games Industry as a whole?

Stomp ya later...I guess...

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